Close To Chapter 12

I thought today I would give Kelsey some of the bad mood I'm feeling. ;-) Yesterday I did get some work done on chapter twelve. It's actually mostly done, it just needs to have isolated sentences connected, and the last page or so finished typing. I make another small time jump in this chapter, which doesn't happen all that often in the book.

People have been asking me how close to finished this book is, and I have to tell them I don't know. Every week or so I chance my mind on how to get to the end, which I can SEE, but not a clear path TO it. If I didn't know it would make the book way too short, I'd say it could be finished in three more chapters, maybe four.

Whattaya Know?

My brain has come back. *g* Been pretty out of it the last few days, and grumpy as hell, too. But today I remembered EVERYTHING I wanted to bring to work. Memory is an iffy thing with me, at best.

I have a good feeling about getting chapter 12 done by Friday.

Oh, and it's been an entire week without a drink. Not that I don't think of it EVERY DAY, but I don't get all freaky and have to try and not think about the whiskey bottle in the kitchen. That's nice. That bottle is LOUD.

Slow But Still Going

I've been outlining again, this time concentrating on emotions, cause you know how hard it is for me to connect with emotions of any kind, especially people I've made up. ;-) Just before dropping off last night I rooted around for a pen around the bed and made a couple of notes.

And I have to get chapter 12 done this week, or else. ;-)

While waiting for my computer to be returned to me this afternoon I put down some words, with a little more feeling than before. *g* The morning was totally busy in the office, but its really slacked off. Today I'm feeling really into the story and wanting to see it finished like, right now.

TIred Of This

BIG storm last night - we've had an awful lot of those. Lots of bright, loud lightning which of course woke me up about 11:00, and I noticed the power was out AGAIN. Then I couldn't go to sleep because of the sound and light show, and worrying about the alarm going off. Pewter snuggled up to me, I had to stop tossing and turning, and I got a couple (literally) hours of sleep. The alarm woke me up an hour early AGAIN, so I didn't realize for a half hour that the reason I was so tired was that I had gotten up at 4:00. The lights were still out when we left at 7:30.

Yesterday I got a little mean with Kelsey. I keep forgetting how they're feeling, and how more forcefully they would react to a situation than I would. It's hard for the Show No Feelings girl to make her characters react.

Long, Hot Weekend

I did some writing, but mostly it was too hot. I was especially stupid on Sunday, when I burned a large trash (downed wood) pile in 90+ degrees. Did I mention I'm stupid?

Hey, Remember Me? ;-)

Yeah, I'm a slacker. Work on the book has been so slow that I didn't really have much to talk about. I'm still working on it but it's damned slow and so very frustrating.

Parker and Kelsey are in chapter twelve, exhausted, without a plan and just about at their end. This is when they meet a couple of people and the story goes in a different direction. I don't know how well this will work, but I thought I'd give it a try. I always meant for them to meet these guys, but this part has always been kind of nebulous in my head.

Thoughts

It occured to me this weekend - this very long, hot, overworked weekend - that I learned a lesson in the flood that I can use in the book. Even though I could feel my shoulder being injured, I kept shoveling water and mud and rock because it had to be done. The thought that I should stop never entered my mind because It Had To Be Done So I Could Not Stop. Somehow, with the re-write, I've got to work that into both Parker and Kelsey's stories.

At least I'm out of the sling and able to type with relatively pain. Thursday I'm getting needled by my acupuncturist and that will hopefully speed the healing. Money is going out of my checking account at an appalling rate, mostly for vacation spending a month ago. *sigh* I've been really wanting to buy stuff but putting it off (like an external hard drive for back ups). Maybe I'll be able to bring myself to pull the trigger now.

WET!!!

We're not drowned, but that was one long fucking weekend. I'm still in a bit of a daze, actually. But we had it easier than a lot of people around us. The back room flooded to six inches around midnight Saturday, and we got it dug out at about four thirty. It took that long because it was too much for the shop vac so we hauled out the five gallon buckets and threw/carried water out as fast as we could, into the lightning and continuing heavy rain. We couldn't keep up with it till the rain let up about three. Then we went to bed and slept a couple of hours until it started again and before we could get into the back room it was flooded again to six inches. This time, though, it was light enough for me to go outside - in the rain and lightning - to find out where the drain wasn't working and put the shovel to good use. About ten thirty we got the rooms cleared again.

We didn't lose the hot water heater or the freezer, but just about eleven Saturday morning - AFTER I made coffee, thank goodness ;-) - the lights went out and stayed that way till dinner time Sunday. In the meanwhile, Birdie was working on putting things right on the hill, and I was at the bottom working on our washed out driveway. The new ditch we dug at the bottom worked GREAT, so there were only a couple of "smallish" ruts (smallish compared to it being completely washed out, which it would have been), but at the road it was impassable for the car, and the county road was washed out about halfway across just up from our mailbox, and nearly all the way across just around the corner downstream. I spent a couple of hours re-digging the ditch, filling in ruts, hauling riprap in the wheelbarrow to put in our drive, and digging gravel out of the creek to fill it in some. I managed to make a path and gave out. We got the clothes out of the washer (from Friday night) and hung them out to dry. It was kinda funny, trying to figure out where to tie the rope.

Irony: the sun was so strong yesterday we've both got sunburns. Both of us are physically challenged this morning with repetitive motion stress. I *should* be wearing a sling, but was embarassed to wear it this morning. I get really tired of people asking me if I saw the doctor so he could tell me to wear a sling. No, I didn't see a fucking doctor, I don't need someone to tell me my shoulder is hurt. *growl*

Anyway, we're here, and we were lucky compared to a LOT of people all around where we live. It's a lot worse than the fucking news is letting on. So fucking what most of central Indiana just had a hundred year flood. It's Indiana, so the morons in a boat in the Carribean gets more tv time.

Writing: I got some good writing done on Friday at work and was really looking forward to using my new laptop this weekend. Ha.

Rain And A Day Off

Wednesday was the worst rain and flooding I've ever seen in Bloomington, and I've lived here more than 30 years. People still talk about the snow of '78. Now they'll talk about the flood of '08. Thursday morning I woke up feeling horrible, so I stayed home, laid on the couch and slept a lot and messed with my new laptop. The only bad thing about new computers is how much you have to set everything the way you like it, and load the software you generally use. I put Casino Empire on and fired it up. It's a goofy little game that normally takes about a minute and a half to load on the old laptop. It shows a line of showgirls and runs "funny" witticisms along the bottom while it's loading. Yesterday it loaded so fast I literally blinked and missed it. I tried typing on chapter twelve, but that made my head hurt worse. Didn't even watch tv or a movie.

Der

I was so caught up in the Big Flood this morning, and getting my new laptop days earlier than I expected, that I forgot to write some words here.

Kelsey and Parker need to run into living people. There has to be some more killing, or the zombies will stop being a threat. Now I have them exhausted and frustrated, and they run into some goons who will escort them to the Reverend Spevak, who we met (sorta) in chapter one (which will end up massively re-written eventually, but I was so ecstatic when I finished it last year *g*).

I'm kinda feeling my way at this point, because the outline gets fuzzy at this point. I know what I want to happen, and I know where it ends, but how - exactly - it's going to get there I'm going to find out as I write, I think.

Stormy Weather

The back room will be flooded tonight. It's coming down hard outside, and it's almost time for me to go to lunch. Bleh. At least I don't have to work this afternoon. I'm tired and cranky and my back keeps trying to spasm because I'm on my period. AND the storm just knocked off my computer while I was watching a poker tournament on tv. Hmph.

I'm working on chapter twelve, now, having gotten the (I hope) funny stuff with chapter eleven out of the way. I feel like I should read everything I've written so far before I make a bunch more continuity errors like I did in the first draft of eleven. Sheesh.

Parker and Kelsey are about to meet some other survivors. For just a moment they're happy about it, but things are going to go south...

New And Old

Old, in that I've been working on this chapter for an embarassingly long time. New, as in it's "finished" and I will be sending it to Kate later this morning. I'm having a bad day today (hormonally stoned), so not much more to report beyond I'm very happy I've gotten past it, and I don't care if it sucks - it's done.

That Was Big

I put 1,300 words on the page yesterday. Brain dead? Hell yeah. Happy camper? You bet! *g*



Kelsey got a gun, and Parker is beginning to flag. Things are going to change radically for them very soon.

Yes!

Looks like I'm a writer again. Last night I wrote so long my hand cramped. Of course, I was sitting in the truck, so not a great setting for writing. *g* I was so concentrated that I literally didn't hear the radio and a whole hour passed without my really noticing. This was at the fairgrounds, where Birdie had a master gardener meeting - and where she may have been snookered into working the county fair. *g* They've been trying to get her to run some of the vegetable competitions, because she's fair and works hard. Of course, she keeps laughing in their face... ;-)

Anyway, I completely broke through that block that's been stopping me. I got most of chapter 11 finished, and hope to complete the first draft this afternoon.

More Character

Had some really good ideas pop into my head in the shower this morning. As expected, half of them fled before I could write them down, but I got most of them pencilled into my little notebook. I love the flashes of ideas, but not getting them written down frustrates the hell out of me.

This afternoon I wrote more words than I have in a long time. I *finally* got a handle on that rough stretch in chapter eleven, and I'm convinced it's because I understand the characters a lot better than I did before. Happy camper, here.

WOW!

Watched the first half of Diary of the Dead this morning. What a great film!

Then, as I was giving Birdie her morning back rub, I had some cool thoughts about Parker. Why the hell is the GUY turning into the main character of my story? Weird. Anyway, the point is that I WROTE THEM DOWN. I think I was inspired by Romero this morning.

New Day

Getting rid of toxins in the system really sucks. It's getting easier by the day, but I still really WANT a drink. No, I haven't gone cold turkey, but darned close. Considering how much I was downing before, I may as well have done it. Much as I love the drink, the biggest problem is how to break such a long-term habit, and we all know how much me loves me habits.

Now, how to get other habits, like WRITING. I got some work done yesterday while at work, but then the freakin evaluations were returned and Donna and I busted ass getting them distributed.

Parker is a little meaner than I've been writing him, and Kelsey is crazier than I've been writing her. Losing her grandmother like that has put her off her rocker, and Parker has her half convinced that she's going to die soon.

Again, with the I-don't-do-passion-well thing. I have to CONTINUALLY remind myself to NOT make the characters so fucking logical and agreeable. Hmph. ;-)

Fun Stuff

No, not all the mowing and hacking and working our asses off (I wish) from the weekend. The fun stuff is writing words again. Parker and Kelsey are in much better focus for me, as is Skyview. Still not a LOT of words, but I'm getting them in. At this rate I'll be finished about 2010.

Safe trip, Kate!

Long For A Short Week

One of the dance faculty kept me so busy yesterday (she literally waited for me to get back because she didn't trust anyone else to do the work) that I took a short lunch and was brain wiped by four o'clock. SHEESH!



Still, I worked on the book as much as I was able. Vacation made me weak. *laugh* Needs to build them writin muskels.

She's Back!

Vacation was nice. Saw a lot of bears, one of them amazingly close. Didn't get to write much, because it's impossible to write while negotiating the narrow Cades Cove road, dodging stupid fucking tourists and looking for bears (of which I spotted several - one of them a half mile away!). Then when we were stopped I was too busy to pull out the notebook I had with me.

But, I thought a lot about Kinsey and Parker. They were too nebulous, as complete people, in my head when I started writing the book. That would be the number one lesson I think I've learned - that you really need a lot more preparation than I gave to the project before beginning to write.

Getting Organized

More baby steps, as Kate continues to tell me. (I wonder if it'll take as many years to get that through my head as her other lessons did?) A few more words today. A little more clarity in my mind what's going on and what's going to happen.

New Words At Last

Not a lot, of course, but Friday saw some production. The better news is that it was in a place I was having trouble before I threw in the towel.

There was more than one reason I gave it up. Mental problems, sure, and a little of it was my class was taking a lot more free time than a class usually does, but another big problem is that I felt overwhelmed by the book. I've NEVER been able to write long before and even though I'm not really into book sized territory yet, it feels like the nosebleed section.

Big Time Trouble

Yes, I've been having problems again, and of course I went into denial and tried to handle it myself - badly. At least this timeI didn't make Birdie suffer for years first.

I'm at the beginning of my third life. Parker and Kelsey should benefit from it.

Little To Say

I'm just feeling quiet today. Did well playing last night - memorizing helps!

Days Like These

These are the nice, slow days that make the horribly busy days do-able. I did some typing this morning, and the words came out at a decent speed, but really, really stale and boring. Bleh. This is going to be a difficult chapter to revise.

Fri-DAY! Bout Time

This week seems like it has taken FOREVER. So, I'm taking next Monday off. My hope (as always) is to get some things done that really need to be finished.

Today I'm typing the handwritten stuff from chapter eleven, and of course filling in as I go, because typing is so much faster than scribbling. I'm seriously not worried about the re-write when I'm finished with the first draft, because I've never had a problem with that. I love adding stuff, and usually catch a lot of the stupid stuff. ;-)

A Hard Night Out

We went to see a terribly disturbing play last night - Birdie's first pick in two years and we went on a whim. She promised never to pick again.

My creative juices kicked in yesterday afternoon and I typed for a while. Of course, as soon as I started it got busy in the office. I left feeling hugely frustrated.

I think I may be having trouble because I'm trying to write in sequence. I've never tried that before, and I'm too scatterbrained, as a rule, to do things in a straight line.

So, I'm going to have to skip ahead a bit and go back to the place I'm stuck in. Ironically, I'm stuck in a place I was actually looking forward to writing. Will I ever get this? You know, understand what the hell I'm doing? Probably not.

I Feel Stupid, Oh So Stupid

I feel like killing someone. I feel like going home and hiding under the bed. I feel like a complete failure in every way possible.

Hormone day.

I've warned everyone I see that they should not talk to me or expect anything from me.

Last night I was at the library for a while waiting for Birdie to finish a Master Gardener class, and got some writing done. I don't even care. I just want this day to end, which it will late tonight because we decided at the last moment to go see a play.

New Day

Or, a Monday, anyway. Though it has officially turned to spring, the weather continues to hold out for winter. Seems this one has lasted forever, and I'm really looking forward to things greening up, even though we'll be mowing lawn here AND in the south.

I need to really push myself, and get more done with the book. This lingering is killing me, because I want to see it finished.

Friday, But Not Drowned

It rained for 36 hours WITHOUT QUITTING. It NEVER rains that much here. Except that once fifteen years ago when it rained so much we played a softball tournament on an infield that had three inches of standing water all the way to the parking lot, and I had to dig a two foot hole to plant my foot while pitching because the ground was soft to that deep. Normally around here twenty minutes of steady rain is odd, but it DID NOT STOP for a day and a half.

Still writing. Sloooooooow.

Paper Trail

The problem with writing longhand...well, there's more than one problem. One is that it takes longer to write anything, and another is that you have to type it later.

Good things are that you can write any where, any time, and aren't tied to a desk or a heavy assed laptop. I got some good writing done waiting for my piano class to start last night, because I walked over right after work, when I knew there would be no one in the hallway who would talk to me. I worked that flair pen. ;-)

Then in class, he QUIZZED us, and asked me to define the G7 chord. Sheesh. I had a moment of panic, then did it. He's one of those instructors you WANT to do well for, so his brief (very brief) smile was a nice pat on the back.

I'm Back

Blogger really sucks sometimes.

Luckily, I didn't write much. Essentially, I said how much I'm happy to be back in the office so I don't have to work so hard. It may have been only three days off, but Birdie can pack those days full. ;-)

The Snail's Pace

About the speed of my writing, I'm afraid. But hey, it finishes the race.

Parker is having fun hanging out with a cop. Hopefully today Kelsey will get her gun. I hope the comedy goes over all right.

Yeah, Baby

So, I was hit by another thunderbolt yesterday. A reason WHY some of my characters are the way they are, and suddenly the way to the end of the book is more clear.

But enough about easy things like writing a book - my midterm is tonight and I *still* can't play those fucking tunes. Argh! I think *knowing* I'm going to fuck it up is the only thing saving my sanity right now. ;-)

Yes, Yes

I'm still working on the book, but I've been writing in a notebook I carry everywhere, because all my creative moments were coming at a bad time for me, computer-wise. Plus, I think it's easier on the psyche to be going slow if you're writing longhand. *shrug* I'm still going.

For about a day I was hung up on who the POV for eleven would be, because I started with Kelsey. It just didn't work, though, so I started again with Parker. Much better. *s* Kelsey just came whipping around the corner with the car, and he couldn't BE more surprised. If they ever do a screenplay, this will be a great scene. ;-)

Nice And Quiet

Just the way I like it. I'm the most UNambitious person you're ever going to meet, and someone who doesn't care if you sniff at my lack of ambition. Probably because I'm going to be sneering at you for BEING ambitous. *g*

Today is the dance auditions and there are loads of girls, and a few boys, discovering that college dance classes are a little different than they're used to. *eg* The plus for me is I don't have to fuck with the folders and letters and stuff for another six months. Whew!

Birdie's birthday went well. I didn't get her any huge presents, just several smaller ones - one of which she bought without realizing it. Took her about an hour to notice. Yes, she laughed. That particular trick is one of the long-standing themes of our relationship. (Yes! I will pay her back.) I bought her lunch and then dinner then we went home where I was asleep by eight-thirty, so she had her birthday whiskey by herself. She said she got a load of e-cards and that made her very happy.

Piano class last night was HORRIBLE. I *could* not make my hands do what my brain told them to do, and the teacher got a bit impatient, and I felt like a fool. Mid-term is next Thursday, and I'm dreading having to play - get this - Kum Ba Yah. *shaking head* That is one tough fucking song for a novice.

On the writing front, I'm starting to pick it up a little, though I was in no mood for it Wednesday after the big blow up, and yesterday that faculty was watching me like a hawk, so I had to be all secretive. *rolling eyes* This afternoon I'll be going upstairs and continuing to work on chapter eleven. Yesterday I was working on mapping and outlining, and taking notes. I've got a much better idea what my town looks like, and that helps. But I had definite ideas about each character's psyche when I began that just isn't making it onto the page. I'm only making notes now for the re-write, and I can only hope that will make it in later.

A New View

Okay, so the last few days have been rough. As is usually the case, though, it finally got quiet around here and I've been putting my sudden free time to good use. I'm putting together that map/history of Skyview I should have started with, so *I* can see what the hell's going on, much be able to tell my reader. I'm getting a much better idea of where they're at, and where they're going. Also, I'm writing it all on glossy paper, using an extra-fine sharpie, cause it's fun. *g*

Man, do I feel better! There's not much to do today (though there's always something), so I expect I will get a lot of ZS work done.

Whoo hoo!

Too Long

Way too long since I've been active here. I guess it's no secret that I'm struggling to get back into a rythym since Christmas. It's as busy here now as before, but I'm not making time to write as well as I was then. If I'm going to be finished with the first draft by the end of the semester - then I'd have to be living in a fantasy world. The words are still getting put down, but not as many, on average, per day as I was, and I was already not writing as many as I needed to per day.

COLD

Too cold. I hate it.

Yesterday I did post here, but Blogger ate it and I never got a chance to get back to it.

Did great on my piano test for the first two pieces, then my mind went walkabout and I completely screwed the last piece. Dangit. I worked hard on that, too, but I was just too tired.

Wrote notes on the book yesterday, because I was too busy to write downstairs, and when I went up to 296 Carol was waiting with her Latest Big Project that needs my creative touch. So, no words on the page, but I the notes concerned the map of Skyview I need to finish before the re-write.

A Rest

That's what I finally got last night. Yes, I woke up about ten times, but last night I actually got back to sleep every time. I don't feel rested, but I don't feel exhausted either.

Kate sent chapter nine to me last Friday, and I'd like to reciprocate soon with chapter 10. How can something so fun as writing be so traumatic at the same time?

Time and Space

Finally a good day, at least for getting things done. My desk is clear, if not my mind. I intend to sleep tomorrow until I am finished, even if that means being mean to Birdie. Tuesday is my second hearing (piano test), and I need work, and I need to do housework, but most importantly, I need to sleep.

Parker almost sounds angry in chapter ten. I wonder why I don't do emotion very well, even when I'm faking it (aka fiction)?

They're Coming

The words, that is. Still getting down on paper, but it's so damned slow. Sometimes I want to throttle the kids I see loafing around. Wish I had that kind of free time.

And if I don't start getting some good sleep soon, I think I may go completely insane. My brain feels like mush most of the time now, rather than about half the time. Hmph.

Scary Places

For some reason, pawn shops are kinda scary to me. Even the one in town that I go to now and then. They smell strongly of dirty men and auto oil, and are inhabited by people I know not to trust. That's why one is going into the book.

Something else that's scary? My ability to NOT scream at boys who come into my office, sit in the guest chair and snuffle snot rather than blowing their nose.

Birdie stayed home sick today. She got a bad case of poison ivy and is in the fever stage. Unfortunately, she probably got it dragging big limbs in my yard last weekend. Of course, that leaves me to drive home alone tonight on about three quarters of an inch of ice. I *will* be walking up the hill when I get home tonight after class.

...if I make it home.

Back on Track

After a frightening bit of "I don't want to work on it anymore", I've gotten back into it. Parker takes on a dead guy, mano a mano, and grays out for a moment from the shock of a really hard tackle.

I did that once, when I "tackled" our prop forward after being loaned to Purdue for a rugby game. I woke up to find my team all the way on the other side of the pitch, still playing, and two fans standing over me laughing. I was out for a little longer than Parker, but I still remember that play - or most of it. *laugh* The reason they were laughing? I knocked myself out, hitting her that hard, but didn't manage to do more than trip her a little.

Anyway, I've done some hundreds of words, and expect to do more when I get upstairs - unless Professor Kennedy snags me to work on that damned tee shirt. Parker and Kelsey are starting to have words. They're both tired and cranky with the whole end-of-the-world thing, and just as they're both about to say fuck off to each other, they hear the cop. The one with the GUN.

Ah...but how do you get a gun out of the holster of a zombie? *g*

Ideas

While driving to work this morning we passed a beautiful field of trees shrouded in dense fog caressing the lower trunks. Made me think of a story, a fantasy story no less, called Sea of Mist.

I don't know if I'll get any writing done today. My brain is total mush. Not even close to enough sleep lately, took an Advil PM last night, and allergies on top of that. I'm actually kinda suffering right now at my desk, I'm so tired.

Well, Yeah

It's been way too long since I last posted. The writing dropped off severely over Christmas break, so I didn't feel I had anything to add. Right now I'm suffering from "It's crap, but I must push on." It's a little disconcerting, how often I have to remind myself the IDEA is to FINISH, duh.

I sent Kate chapter nine the other day, and you know, it's not finished. But I'm plowing on and keeping notes. *s* She's a gift, man. The main reason I'm still going. My goal is to be finished with the first draft of Zombie Sky by the end of the semester, but it's going to be close if I don't crank it up.

This morning I tried to park the truck off the drive because we're supposed to get a doozy of a snow storm tomorrow. So of course I got it stuck SIDEWAYS in the drive. Duh, again. And now we're beginning the PLAYING WITH BOTH HANDS AT THE SAME TIME thing in piano. It struck me, about the tenth time I tried the piece last night, that, although I have great striking technique and muscle tone due to years of typing, you DON'T type with BOTH hands at the SAME time. Brain, meet coordination. Argh. I took piano because Birdie wanted me to, and I'm having a good time with it, better than with guitar because I'm actually learning a lot, especially music theory. But man, it's tough.

Score!

As in, I have a goal. ;-) I *need* a goal, which is why I learn better in a classroom.

So, my goal is to have the first draft COMPLETED by the end of this semester. So there.

New Year

Really great vacation. While alone I determined I was getting boring in my writing again. Not enough DRAMA. Where is the fear? Not everyone is like me, you know, totally taking world anihilation in stride. ;-) There aren't enough zombies, either. Hmph.

I also read World War Z. Big mistake, cause that's a really fun book. How depressing.

One of my faculty says if I finish my first draft she'll let me order her syllabus in "zombie puke green" for that semester.